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The small bird with clipped wings
An Asian influenced mum’s worst nightmare is for their child to be neglecting their ever-so-important studies and frequently experience the thrill of escaping the clutches of the house. This very child would prove to be the very embarrassment of the family and for her pride’s sake, she isn’t going to disown her, is she?
My sister is very fortunate for she would very soon be able to escape from this prison guarded home. She has somehow managed to tolerate all the suffering that has been unwillingly served to her. How you ask?It’s by turning 18 on her birthday. Well, that’s an assumption that had been made.
I, on the other hand, have yet to experience the “torture” that she has gone through. Before you jump to assumptions, let me brief you on my life. I’ve recently turned 16 and since then, I feel asthough there’s been a barrier placed around me. I spent quite a few good years of my life online and may I add that the only social life I have is with people I’ve never personally met. Don’t think I really hate it because I don’t! I truly love some of the them however, this has a great impact on me in the real world.
In the virtual world I’m the bubbly, ever so hyper Anna, a name I take on because I find my real name quite ridiculous. In the real world, I’m the girl who can easily communicate with girls which is expected since I’ve gone to an all girls school for my whole life, literally. I’ve been sheltered my entire life and the only time I communicated with the other sex is when I did volunteering work at a charity shop. Even then, my parents were suspicious that I was having a secret time with a 20 year old boy who seemed to me like the big brother I never had IN THE REAL WORLD. I have several brothers in this virtual world of mine but, I’ve never met them and because of the great difference in time zones, It’s quite difficult to communicate.
Well, I’ve strayed quite a bit. Anyway, the thing I dislike the most is that I’m never allowed to leave the house, unless it’s the weekly visit to the supermarket. Hurray! I get to push the trolley! What joy! No seriously. I can’t even go to the reservoir which is next to my house with my piano teacher, who is a roughly 40 year old lady with a husband and 11 year old child. Why? Well, the best of excuses come from my mother. I have to study and the weather is bad? I study every night and my grades are pretty good (Touchwood). Yes, I’m not perfect in all my subjects but hey, atleast I try hard.
Here’s the best bit: “just because you turn 16, you can’t go out of the house and here and there…”, as quoted from a conversation between my mother and I. Honestly! Yes, studies are my most important of priorities but, give me space! I don’t want to go to parties and drink till I can’t stand nor talk properly, I just want to be able to go to the public library, walk around with my friends which, may I say are rather sensible people. Yes, I want to meet some sensible guys and experience my first kiss and have a romantic relationship but, I can wait till I’m older. I’m not desperate to do it NOW. I just want to make friends with a few of them! I know some other people have situations much worse than mine and I’m thankful for my lifestyle but, It’s quite unfair in a way.
I’m back from Paris :) Did I mention that I went there in crutches and went around in a wheelchair :P It was quite hilarious!
Till later xx
If you are going to fall in love with me, it’s only fair that you know what you are falling in love with.
You are falling in love with my insecurities, ‘n my obsession with trying to figure out what everyone thinks of me.
You are falling love with my immaturity,my constant need to feel loved ‘n appreciated, my overactive tear ducts, my internet obsession, my tendency to be too clingy. You fall in love with my troubled past, ‘n my hopes ‘n dreams, ‘n how I’m a hopeless romantic at heart. If you fall in love with me,
You fall in love with my self-hate ‘n all my imperfections ‘n my perception that nobody could ever love me. But, You are also falling in love with the way my eyes will smile when I’m with you, the way I’ll text you in the mornings just telling you I hope you have a great day.
You’re falling in love with the occasionally humorous and/or thought-provoking things I say, ‘n the way I blush when people ask me about you. But to me, The most important thing will be that you are falling in love with me, despite my thinking that it is impossible.. !
